So let me tell you this. Chloé had her fussiest day, she wanted none of daddy and just kept crying. As a a-type taking time off and not getting the love from my new daughter it was a difficult day to be sitting at home. Certainly that baby momma is needing my help less and less.
Naturally as soon as my parents came over for a short visit she was an angel. I received a night pass to head to the game and host prospects and visit clients. I'm not going to lie, it was nice to get back to what I do best but at the same time I was missing our daughter and worried she'd go crazy on momma. Naturally that perfect little angel slept the whole time, I left the game early to come spend time at home and she even slept through my loud YES with the shootout winner. May as well get used to it now kid...
She also decided to sleep through most of the night, baby momma had to wake her a few times to feed her but oh my god almost a full night's sleep. I feel like my brain went from being unable to process simple math equations to being able to discuss the theory of relativity. But let's be honest...I'm going to utilize it to analyze this weekend's football match ups.
Today's the first actual doctor's appointment at 10am, and we are both worried. We wake up at 8am and baby is quiet enough that we both have time to shower and get ready. This is amazing guys. By 925, I'm about to put her in the car seat(oh the dreaded car seat) and she starts making weird noises in my arms. I tap her on the back once and twice and oh god, she spits up all over me. Let me sidebar...when I got dressed, I grabbed a clean pair of shorts and a t shirt and wasn't sure they went well together. Squares on the shorts along with horizontal lines on the t shirt, what would Melissa rivers say? I have a future diva who decides she hates the combination and tells me 'what not to wear'...I love her already!
Friday, 13 November 2015
Sunday, 8 November 2015
The Car Seat
Ah Day 5. Daddy
starts the day by asking mommy when the second feeding was…”1 am? I don’t think I woke up” . Another lesson is learned…never assume mom
went to sleep and managed to wake up for a feeding. I quickly find out that mom was awake from 10
to almost 2 am and offer anything in the world she wants for breakfast. “dig upwards stupid”
Today’s adventure is a trip to the clinic to check up on Chloé’s weight and overall health. Easy peasy, just need to get some lunch ready while mom gets ready... I end up eating while sitting on the floor and entertaining Chloé. And now to put her in the car seat just like the nurse showed us…oh crap. Where do the legs go? Let’s try that again….crap, Chloé is crying…maybe my wife remembers and oh no, tears from her as well as she can't figure it out. Everyone breathe and relax, Dan can do this, I know I can, and YES! He pulls it off! Now calm momma down and get her on the road. Men, you will be constantly impressed by what your wife goes through during the labour and then when she becomes a mom so constantly remind her. She will not know how great she has been and she frets over the things that you find small with the baby. She will have these moments of frustration, so just help her and talk her through them.
This is also a great time for another sidebar, as much as we failed with the car seat it will not compare to my failure while putting together the stroller. Rewind a couple months ago, the stroller had sat in a box for a few days and baby momma was out of the house so I decided to try to put it together and surprise her. Pretty easy until we arrived to the back wheels, I just couldn't get the first one in. So I wrapped my hand around it and attempted to slide it in and OH MY the pain! It seems there was a lock on the wheel which my palm hit and the wheel immediately slid in with my weight behind it onto my finger. It jammed my ring finger nail and caused days of pain, x-rays proofed there were no broken bones but I ended up at emergency a few days later where they poked a hole through my nail to drain it and relieve the pressure. Future dad of the year potential right here...
The appointment itself, you ask? It goes great, our little girl has been feeding well and is regaining the birth weight! Momma is rewarded with a nap (obviously after another feeding) and Chloé goes to sleep in her swing while daddy watches and…closes his eyes and gets 10 minutes of shut eye.
What a great day, I'm enjoying this little bundle of joy and her ability to be pretty quiet and peaceful, this will obviously go on forever.
Today’s adventure is a trip to the clinic to check up on Chloé’s weight and overall health. Easy peasy, just need to get some lunch ready while mom gets ready... I end up eating while sitting on the floor and entertaining Chloé. And now to put her in the car seat just like the nurse showed us…oh crap. Where do the legs go? Let’s try that again….crap, Chloé is crying…maybe my wife remembers and oh no, tears from her as well as she can't figure it out. Everyone breathe and relax, Dan can do this, I know I can, and YES! He pulls it off! Now calm momma down and get her on the road. Men, you will be constantly impressed by what your wife goes through during the labour and then when she becomes a mom so constantly remind her. She will not know how great she has been and she frets over the things that you find small with the baby. She will have these moments of frustration, so just help her and talk her through them.
This is also a great time for another sidebar, as much as we failed with the car seat it will not compare to my failure while putting together the stroller. Rewind a couple months ago, the stroller had sat in a box for a few days and baby momma was out of the house so I decided to try to put it together and surprise her. Pretty easy until we arrived to the back wheels, I just couldn't get the first one in. So I wrapped my hand around it and attempted to slide it in and OH MY the pain! It seems there was a lock on the wheel which my palm hit and the wheel immediately slid in with my weight behind it onto my finger. It jammed my ring finger nail and caused days of pain, x-rays proofed there were no broken bones but I ended up at emergency a few days later where they poked a hole through my nail to drain it and relieve the pressure. Future dad of the year potential right here...
The appointment itself, you ask? It goes great, our little girl has been feeding well and is regaining the birth weight! Momma is rewarded with a nap (obviously after another feeding) and Chloé goes to sleep in her swing while daddy watches and…closes his eyes and gets 10 minutes of shut eye.
What a great day, I'm enjoying this little bundle of joy and her ability to be pretty quiet and peaceful, this will obviously go on forever.
Saturday, 7 November 2015
Home Sweet Home and the first Pooping Incident
Finally, the battery of tests are run! Our child is normal and ready to go home and
we are ready to lie down on our own bed.
But first, to put her in this car seat…what’s that? The clips are supposed to go around the
legs? Oh…thank you Nurse for helping us out with this latest little challenge.
Night 1 goes well, Chloé has made a habit of having her
energy peak past 10:00 pm but she finally calms down and falls asleep…only to
be woken up every 3 hours for feedings.
But ¾ of a good night’s sleep feels like heaven and we decide to get
ambitious on day two and bathe the little angel.
The preparation takes a good 15 minutes and
now to change her diaper. What a
sweetheart and OH MY GOD, she’s projectile pooping onto mommy. I know, we’ve seen this moment in movies and
television but oh my is it hilarious to watch.
As the supporting husband I’m trying to stifle my laughter and tell my
wife it’s ok, well attempting to figure out how to clean it off and get this
diaper change done. She begins to laugh probably because there's nothing else to do in this situation. The fact I pull it
off without my wife ripping me apart is a crowning achievement in my life and
my understand of women and hormones…I’d like to thank my mom and my two sisters
for giving me visibility to female emotions as I grew up.
Sidebar - there are many bar nights with my friends where I've uttered "I wish I had a GoPro camera attached to me so that we could relive this". Can you imagine if I had one in that moment? The hilarity that would come from that video along with the potential to scare my wife at every family event by teasing her to put it on would be PRICELESS.
Sidebar - there are many bar nights with my friends where I've uttered "I wish I had a GoPro camera attached to me so that we could relive this". Can you imagine if I had one in that moment? The hilarity that would come from that video along with the potential to scare my wife at every family event by teasing her to put it on would be PRICELESS.
Naturally, once she almost causes World War 3 in my kitchen
Chloé is content and sleeps through most of the day, even proving hard to wake up for
feedings. She still doesn’t want to play
monopoly with me, so I’ve taken on throwing the dice for her and making
property trades that benefit me. This trading
ability a skill I’ve developed through years of fantasy sports. Naturally, on the first and second nights
her energy spikes….right at 10:30 and she begins to fret for what seems like
the entire night but is actually just a couple hours. When I say “just” a couple hours, parents can
understand that it doesn’t feel like “just” and all you young’ins without
children will someday understand the pain of trying to go to sleep and having a
child full of energy crying. In the meantime, enjoy watching hours of Netflix and deciding to go to the bar at 11pm when this old man is attempting to get to sleep.
The adventures will only get better from here. We are blessed with a healthy, pretty well
behaved baby and we are loving every second of it. And hopefully, she never poops on me...if this was a movie I'd be worried that this was foreshadowing. After having typed that, I'm envision that moment of "i'll be right back" in a scary movie.
Friday, 6 November 2015
The (long) road home
I’ve romanticized meeting my child for the first time and
the emotions that you go through but the next steps are just not the same. After the mother and child are deemed
healthy, you’re moved to a room which is essentially a little larger than my
cubicle at work and has a single bed, a chair that converts into a cot and a
bassinet for your child. Space is
limited and the walls are not sound proof so you hear the cries of other
babies while trying to make sure yours sleeps. Despite this, this is your home
for a few days while your wife recovers and your baby learns the ways of the
world...oh and while daddy figures out what the heck he's doing.
On the first night, I immediately got to change my first diaper…which wasn’t that bad. The nurses give you the first one free and I watched to learn the process. She decides to poop again and with my wife bedridden and no nurse around, I know it's my time. Two days ago, I was making sales calls and talking fantasy football and now I'm a freaking dad changing a diaper...
We are extremely lucky that our baby as of yet is easygoing and put up with her father who lacks finesse while he bumbled through his first diaper change. The cot was incredibly uncomfortable (luckily I was warned about this and brought a pillow from home) and the two of us slept a combined 3 or 4 hours on the first night. Lots of "What was that noise?", "Is she awake?", "does she need food?" and every single time...she's asleep peacefully. This will take a while to get used to.
On the first night, I immediately got to change my first diaper…which wasn’t that bad. The nurses give you the first one free and I watched to learn the process. She decides to poop again and with my wife bedridden and no nurse around, I know it's my time. Two days ago, I was making sales calls and talking fantasy football and now I'm a freaking dad changing a diaper...
We are extremely lucky that our baby as of yet is easygoing and put up with her father who lacks finesse while he bumbled through his first diaper change. The cot was incredibly uncomfortable (luckily I was warned about this and brought a pillow from home) and the two of us slept a combined 3 or 4 hours on the first night. Lots of "What was that noise?", "Is she awake?", "does she need food?" and every single time...she's asleep peacefully. This will take a while to get used to.
The next few days are a blur, with nurses
coming in and out to run tests, teach you some tricks of the trade and ensure
your competence as a parent (somehow they deem me fit). For any
future parent, make the most of this!!!
Ask questions and ask the nurses to help you (I’m a terrible swaddler and
asked them to help swaddle as much as I could so she’d be happy and cozy).
The least gratifying feeling as a parent is when you change that diaper perfectly and your child looks up at you and immediately poops again, making you change her again. This will happen, a lot. Luckily she’s so amazingly cute that I let her frustrate me in this way so obviously she takes after her mother.
The least gratifying feeling as a parent is when you change that diaper perfectly and your child looks up at you and immediately poops again, making you change her again. This will happen, a lot. Luckily she’s so amazingly cute that I let her frustrate me in this way so obviously she takes after her mother.
By day 2, I’m begging them to let us out early, trying to figure out how
to speed things up and trying to learn as many skills as I can. Baby momma is slowly recuperating and I'm making runs to the Quickie to grab snacks and treats while our visitors bring us love and well, more treats.
I’d only read about a quarter of the “Preacher” graphic novel collection and by the end of this I’d read the entire series and half a book. I kept waiting for Chloé to play with me but she seemed more intent of sleeping, waking up to pass gas and feeding. Hopefully when we get home, she’ll want to play video games or maybe a little game of Monopoly.
I’d only read about a quarter of the “Preacher” graphic novel collection and by the end of this I’d read the entire series and half a book. I kept waiting for Chloé to play with me but she seemed more intent of sleeping, waking up to pass gas and feeding. Hopefully when we get home, she’ll want to play video games or maybe a little game of Monopoly.
Thursday, 5 November 2015
The Arrival
So Chloé arrived 11 days late and not without coaxing. If I wasn't as smart as I am, I'd say that her momma made her temporary home too inviting and allowed her to sleep a little too much but I'll keep it to myself. Finally, the hospital called us at 6:15 in the am (savages) and asked us to come in for quarter to eight.
Alright young lads, scroll past this long paragraph until it's time to read that first baby book. Baby momma was sufficiently progressing that the induction would be through an iv. Unfortunately the hospital got busy and this didn't start until around 2pm. Luckily, I had a fantasy football trade cooking on my email and tried to distract momma with Netflix. Finally, at 2, we were welcomed into a large room and I mistakenly thought "this is going to happen fast, maybe the three of us can watch Tom Brady sling some touchdowns tonight". Grandma joined us in the room, providing support and a bit of a softer touch. After offering my wife some more Netflix, I decided to turn on the football game (yes kids, that means it was past 8:00...) while she enjoyed the high that came from her epidural. And I waited...and waited and watched the entire game. Things were not progressing as planned and the time came to make the decision to have a c section. This is where I tell the audience that my tough wife has never broken a bone, never had a surgery and has never been admitted to hospital. What this little fiery warrior does not enjoy is the thought of a scalpel touching her skin. And now she was facing that reality. I came to her side and attempt to comfort her, reminding her of the end goal but I knew I could affect the mood so much. Finally, the time came to move to the operating room around 1 am, I moved our bags to the waiting area and went to the scrub room. I internalized my panic, put on some scrubs and was told to wait until all was setup. Probably a good time to mention that I almost faint every time I give blood and that previous experiences visiting hospitals bring back bad feelings.
Hopefully our young fellows have rejoined us with this sentence. Waiting to join your wife I the operating room is something no man should go through. Thoughts flutter through your mind and you can only hope that your partner is calm and ok with what is about to happen. Oh right, she's the one being cut, what a martyr I am. I'm sure that the wait was not that long, but it felt like I was watching the Jacques Lemaire New Jersey Devils play hockey. I sat down and said a few words of hope to no one in particular and tried to relax. Knowing she needed me to be the calm steady force (HA! Dan being calm) while she went through this, I decided to pump myself up. Let me tell you that little waiting area became as fiery as Brock Lesnar's locker room before a fight. I bounced on my feet, punched the air and reminded myself that she needed me.
Now men, understand this, we will never understand the pain women feel during childbirth. I received a firsthand education on the emotional trauma, as my wife lay there awake, shaking and freaking out while they performers surgery. Tough and calm Dan said words of encouragement, brushed his hand against her cheek and reminded her that soon it would be over and she would see her baby girl. Hence the next moment of emotional torture, the beautiful baby comes out and immediately taken care of by a team to nurses, I can see her but my wife cannot. Chloé lets out a cry and my wife's face lights up and the words come: 'I want to see her'. Oh crap...I have to keep this woman calm while her child is inches away but cannot be seen. I give her a play by play of what I understand the nurses are doing (thank god for baby books) as she lies through what must feel like 10 regular season Yankee games. Let me tell you this that moment when you first hold your baby followed by the look in your wife's face as she first puts eyes on her child is like nothing else in the world.
Following this, I got to spend some quality alone time with my daughter in the waiting room, I honestly can't describe these moments and these are memories I will keep forever. I am responsible for a human life and I'm actually not screwing it up as of yet! This is also the moment I realize that this little girl is going to have her daddy wrapped around her finger, is 2am too early in the morning to start calling potential customers and make some more commission? Finally, momma was wheeled in and I placed Chloé in her arms for that initial bonding and the love was on. The cool thing about how everything went down is that I was able to have my moments with our new daughter and then witness them through my wife's eyes, although I'm sure she would have rather just not have waited to have these moments with her.
Can't wait to see what the future brings...
Alright young lads, scroll past this long paragraph until it's time to read that first baby book. Baby momma was sufficiently progressing that the induction would be through an iv. Unfortunately the hospital got busy and this didn't start until around 2pm. Luckily, I had a fantasy football trade cooking on my email and tried to distract momma with Netflix. Finally, at 2, we were welcomed into a large room and I mistakenly thought "this is going to happen fast, maybe the three of us can watch Tom Brady sling some touchdowns tonight". Grandma joined us in the room, providing support and a bit of a softer touch. After offering my wife some more Netflix, I decided to turn on the football game (yes kids, that means it was past 8:00...) while she enjoyed the high that came from her epidural. And I waited...and waited and watched the entire game. Things were not progressing as planned and the time came to make the decision to have a c section. This is where I tell the audience that my tough wife has never broken a bone, never had a surgery and has never been admitted to hospital. What this little fiery warrior does not enjoy is the thought of a scalpel touching her skin. And now she was facing that reality. I came to her side and attempt to comfort her, reminding her of the end goal but I knew I could affect the mood so much. Finally, the time came to move to the operating room around 1 am, I moved our bags to the waiting area and went to the scrub room. I internalized my panic, put on some scrubs and was told to wait until all was setup. Probably a good time to mention that I almost faint every time I give blood and that previous experiences visiting hospitals bring back bad feelings.
Hopefully our young fellows have rejoined us with this sentence. Waiting to join your wife I the operating room is something no man should go through. Thoughts flutter through your mind and you can only hope that your partner is calm and ok with what is about to happen. Oh right, she's the one being cut, what a martyr I am. I'm sure that the wait was not that long, but it felt like I was watching the Jacques Lemaire New Jersey Devils play hockey. I sat down and said a few words of hope to no one in particular and tried to relax. Knowing she needed me to be the calm steady force (HA! Dan being calm) while she went through this, I decided to pump myself up. Let me tell you that little waiting area became as fiery as Brock Lesnar's locker room before a fight. I bounced on my feet, punched the air and reminded myself that she needed me.
Now men, understand this, we will never understand the pain women feel during childbirth. I received a firsthand education on the emotional trauma, as my wife lay there awake, shaking and freaking out while they performers surgery. Tough and calm Dan said words of encouragement, brushed his hand against her cheek and reminded her that soon it would be over and she would see her baby girl. Hence the next moment of emotional torture, the beautiful baby comes out and immediately taken care of by a team to nurses, I can see her but my wife cannot. Chloé lets out a cry and my wife's face lights up and the words come: 'I want to see her'. Oh crap...I have to keep this woman calm while her child is inches away but cannot be seen. I give her a play by play of what I understand the nurses are doing (thank god for baby books) as she lies through what must feel like 10 regular season Yankee games. Let me tell you this that moment when you first hold your baby followed by the look in your wife's face as she first puts eyes on her child is like nothing else in the world.
Following this, I got to spend some quality alone time with my daughter in the waiting room, I honestly can't describe these moments and these are memories I will keep forever. I am responsible for a human life and I'm actually not screwing it up as of yet! This is also the moment I realize that this little girl is going to have her daddy wrapped around her finger, is 2am too early in the morning to start calling potential customers and make some more commission? Finally, momma was wheeled in and I placed Chloé in her arms for that initial bonding and the love was on. The cool thing about how everything went down is that I was able to have my moments with our new daughter and then witness them through my wife's eyes, although I'm sure she would have rather just not have waited to have these moments with her.
Can't wait to see what the future brings...
Tuesday, 3 November 2015
Oh hi there
*this was written on the night following baby-girl's birth*
Early this morning, my warrior wife gave birth to the most beautiful baby girl named Chloé Margaret Julien. I know, Everyone's kid is the most beautiful in their eyes right? But you should see this girl, she stole my heart.
Now I'm lying here after an hour power nap, watching her sleep and being overwhelmed with emotion. I don't know where to start...
Let's start with Facebook. I know...weird, but I just made a candid photo of me giving her a kiss my profile pic. It replaced a picture of myself and the family dog, Moka who passed away suddenly just a few weeks ago. A dog is a man's best friend , but this dog was so much more for our family during an especially difficult time in 07-08. He was our therapist and the one that could bring a smile on our faces. Ironically, in the Alanis Morisette way, the last time I saw him, one of the last things I told my parents was how I couldn't wait to see him interact with this little girl.
So my hope is to entertain , educate and well probably help you kill time on the john. And obviously keep these memories for my sake and Chloé 's. Stay tuned.
I'm suppose to be sleeping and getting rest but I can't comprehend how I feel.
Early this morning, my warrior wife gave birth to the most beautiful baby girl named Chloé Margaret Julien. I know, Everyone's kid is the most beautiful in their eyes right? But you should see this girl, she stole my heart.
Now I'm lying here after an hour power nap, watching her sleep and being overwhelmed with emotion. I don't know where to start...
Let's start with Facebook. I know...weird, but I just made a candid photo of me giving her a kiss my profile pic. It replaced a picture of myself and the family dog, Moka who passed away suddenly just a few weeks ago. A dog is a man's best friend , but this dog was so much more for our family during an especially difficult time in 07-08. He was our therapist and the one that could bring a smile on our faces. Ironically, in the Alanis Morisette way, the last time I saw him, one of the last things I told my parents was how I couldn't wait to see him interact with this little girl.
So my hope is to entertain , educate and well probably help you kill time on the john. And obviously keep these memories for my sake and Chloé 's. Stay tuned.
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